When A.J .Pierzynski ran over michael barret he knocked his Ass over he flew back 3 feet.Then A.J  got up and went to get his helmet.  barret grabbed him and gave him a love tapp to the face.  A.J. barrely moved and inch or flinched and if he did he tried to get out of the way from Scotty who went after barret. Barret punches like a girl. 

Chicago Cubs to St. Louis Cardinals Conversion Form

Thank you for your interest in becoming a member of the St. Louis Cardinals Fan Club. Due to an unprecedented volume of requests, we are currently processing only fan conversion registrations for Chicago Cub fans. Conversion requests from other teams will be accepted once all Cub requests are processed. We expect this to take a number of weeks based on the current backlog of requests.

Please take a few moments to fill out the conversion form below to help us get to know you better and prescribe any required counseling to recover from your previous fan experience.

Name: ______________________________
Last First MI
(Please Print)
Address: _________________________________________________________
# Street

__________________________________________________________
City State ZIP

1. Please indicate the last time you watched the Chicago Cubs win the World Series:
[ ] 1908 (Please leave this form at the front desk of your nursing home)
[ ] Have never witnessed this event

2. Please indicate your favorite moments in Cubs history: (Check all that apply)

[ ] Lou Brock traded to the Cardinals for Ernie Broglio in 1964
[ ] The College of Coaches in the early 60s
[ ] Lee Smith grooving a fastball to Steve Garvey in game 4 of the 1984 NLCS.
[ ] Brant Brown dropping a fly ball in 1998 which forced a 1 game playoff with the Giants.
[ ] Grounder goes between Leon Durhams legs during game 5 of 1984 NLCS
[ ] Fan interfering with Foul Ball during game 6 of 2003 NLCS.
[ ] Leo Durochers AWOL visit to his sons Military School during 1969 pennant run.
[ ] A Black Cat running in front of Ron Santo during critical 1969 series in Shea Stadium.
[ ] Future Hall of Famer Greg Maddox not tendered offer and signs with Atlanta Braves.
[ ] Atlanta Braves featuring Greg Maddox sweep Cubs out of 1989 playoffs
[ ] Don Young dropping the fly ball in 1969
[ ] Mark Grace not tendered offer by Cubs, signs with Diamondback and wins World Series.
[ ] Manager Lee Elias profanity filled tirade at beginning of 1983 season.
[ ] Sammy Sosa getting caught using a corked bat during 2003 season.
[ ] Cubs blow 8 game late August lead and finish 8 games behind 1969 Mets.
[ ] Cubs reliever Dickie Noles drinks full case of beer and attacks Cincinnati police after game.

3. Reasons you believe the Cubs have not won a World Series since 1908: (Check all that apply)

[ ] The curse of the goat
[ ] Lack of managing
[ ] The curse of the goat
[ ] Lack of pitching
[ ] The curse of the goat
[ ] Lack of hitting
[ ] The curse of the goat
[ ] Lack of Defense
[ ] The curse of the goat
[ ] Bad Calls by umpires
[ ] The curse of the goat

4. Have you experienced any of the following after another inevitable Cubs loss: (Check all that apply)

[ ] Headache [ ] Uncontrollable anger
[ ] Heartache [ ] Holes punched in doors or walls
[ ] Nausea [ ] Smashed TV Screens
[ ] Depression [ ] Avoided Cardinals and
White Sox Fans for days

5. Is October your least favorite time of year
[ ] Yes [ ] No

6. Are You tired of saying Wait til next year?
[ ] Yes [ ] No

7. Are you ready to admit that:
a. Stan Musial was better than Ernie Banks?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
b. Bob Gibson was better than Fergie Jenkins?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
c. Ozzie Smith was better than Ryne Sandberg?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
d. Mark McGwire was better than Sammy Sosa?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
e. Jack Buck was better than Harry Caray?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
f. Tony LaRussa is a managerial genius?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
g. The next Cub century will be no better than the last?
[ ] Yes [ ] No
h. The Ivy on the out field walls is ugly and stupid?
[ ] Yes [ ] No

Once you have completed this form, please forward to Busch Stadium. Then burn all of your remaining Cub clothing, memorabilia, and associated reminders. After reviewing your request, the Cardinals Fan Club will contact you with notification of acceptance or rejection.

If accepted, you will receive:

A recommended recuperation program which includes a recording of Meet me in St Louis over and over again;
An opportunity to obtain tickets to the 2004 World Series at Busch Stadium;
Posters of Lou Brock and Bruce Sutter in Cardinal uniforms;
A Dart board sporting the picture of Sammy Sosa;
A copy of our popular handbook, Harassing Cub fans for fun and profit;
A Coupon for a future poster of Mark Prior and Kerry Wood in Cardinals unforms; and
A one year subscription to a weekly support group for ex-Cub fans in your area.

If rejected, you will receive:

Our pity and condolences, plus a 10 second video capturing the past 100 years of Cub highlights in head-to-head competition against the Cardinals narrated by Larry Biitner.

I hereby renounce the Chicago Cubs for all eternity on this the ________ day of _____________________, 200____

___________________________________
(Signed)
____________________________________________________________
(OfficeUse only)

[ ] Approved
[ ] Declined
____________________
August A. Busch, IV

Major Events that Have Occurred Since the Chicago Cubs Won Their Last World Series
-Both radio and TV were invented…
-Fourteen teams were added to Major League Baseball…
-George Burns celebrated his 10th, 20th, 30th, 40th, 50th, 60th, 70th, 80th, 90th –and 100th birthdays…
-Haley’s comet passed Earth,….twice …
-Harry Caray was born, and died…
-The NBA, NHL and NFL were formed, and Chicago teams won championships in each league…
-The US fought in two world wars, the Korean War, Vietnam War and 2 Persian Gulf Wars
-Man landed on the moon…
-Sixteen US presidents were elected…
-Eleven amendments added to the Constitution…
-Prohibition was created and repealed…
-The Titanic was built, set sail, sank, and was re discovered…
-Wrigley Field was built and becomes the oldest park in the National League…
-Flag poles were erected on Wrigley Field roof to hold all of the team’s future World Series pennants, which have since rusted and been taken down…
-A combination of 40 Summer and Winter Olympics have been held…
-Thirteen baseball players have won the Triple Crown…
-Swing music, bell-bottoms, and disco came in style, went out of style and came back in style…
-The Chicago White Sox, Cleveland Indians, Boston Red Sox and Florida Marlins have all won the World Series; what next, the Expos?!?
-The Cubs played almost 15,000 regular-season games, losing the majority of them…
-Alaska, Arizona, Hawaii, Oklahoma and New Mexico were admitted to the Union…