Cubs are the WORST thing in American History

February 10, 2019


Okay – by now you have heard about the horrendous Joe Ricketts story, where basically, he’s a complete douchebag rich man. It’s been a hell of a couple seasons now for the worst professional sports franchise ever. Let’s take a look at the list of things that make the lovable losers the lovable douchebags:

  1. Theo traded his entire soul for Aroldis Chapman, who basically shot a gun at his wife in their garage. Good work, Theo.
  2. Theo then doubled down last season for a guy that completely hates the LGBT community. Daniel Murphy came over, and well – sucked. Karma sucks huh Theo?
  3. The Cubs are sticking with known domestic abuser Addison Russell. Not only are they sticking with him, but in the end, he will be getting a raise. Cool, Theo.
  4. If we want to talk about ON the field. Yu Darvish? HAHAHAHA
  5. Daniel Descalso? LOL. Try to get Bryce Harper and in the end, settle for Daniel Descalso. Theo’s League, eh?
  6. And now this scumbug story. Is there anything the Cubs WILL NOT do?

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